Lucid SL Adventures

The search for the perfect wave

How it all started…

This story begins a few years ago, when Skip said to Chastity, “Chas, let’s go find the perfect wave!” Chastity, always skeptical of Skip’s ideas (she is the bright one in this story), said, “Can I drive? I think it’s better if you navigate, since you don’t know where I’m going less than I do.” Skip thought this was a great idea. Besides, it would give him a chance to wax his board on the way. So Skip turned to his buddy, Herk, who was lifting truck tires because.. well that’s just what Herk does and said, “Herk get the van ready.”
So Herk got the van ready, which consisted of tossing the cooler in the back, and then jumped in his buggy and they sped off on their adventure. To make a long story a little shorter, they arrived on an island called Silent Lucidity, and decided to get out and stretch their legs… mostly because Chastity ran out of gas spinning the tires after she buried the van in the sand. Skip asked Herk why he didn’t fill the gas tank up and Herk shrugged and said, “Hey man, you asked me to get the van ready, not put gas in it.” Then he flexed his considerable biceps because.. well that’s what Herk does. So Skip tried to call for a tow, but had no signal because the perfect wave doesn’t exist in regions that have cell coverage. So he gave Herk the phone and told him to walk until he got a signal. Of course, neither of them thought about Herk driving his buggy or Skip’s buggy that was on the trailer behind the van. Meanwhile Chastity wanted to cool off so she ventured off into the jungle to find a place to swim.

Silent Lucidity

Fast forward a few weeks and Herk still hasn’t returned, but Skip and Chastity had discovered an old ruins in the jungle which had a bunch of funny looking stone heads. They toppled a bunch of the stone heads and fashioned some steps to make it easier to go up and down from the plateau so that they could carry their music gear up and set up a place to dance and stuff. They knocked over some old walls from the ruins and set it up as a dance floor, all the time wishing Herk was here because this was the kind of stuff that he did. Then Chastity went to find a place to cool off and swim.
It wasn’t long after they finished building the dance floor thingy, that Herk finally returned shouting “Pirates! Pirate invasion! Repel boarders!” Skip asked Herk what “repel boarders meant” and Herk just shrugged and said that he saw it once in a movie. Chastity was off swimming and cooling off, so Skip and Herk went to see what they could do about the pirates. Now if you think that they were in any kind of danger, not to worry. These pirates were not bright as Pirates go and extremely lazy, which is saying something because most pirates are lazy by nature.. that’s why they became pirates instead of getting decent low-paying jobs like most hard working folks do. When the pirates’ ship started taking on water, they decided to commandeer another vessel. Well it turned out that the vessel they obtained was a Viking longboat. Not realizing how much work went into making a longboat move, they eventually gave up and the boat drifted into some rocks off the shore of Silent Lucidity and they took their only rowboat to shore and set up camp. They were too lazy to walk over the ridges to the north and were discussing the possibility of building a bridge to cross the stream to the south when Skip and Herk came upon them.
Skip and Herk were discussing how to best handle the pirates, when Chastity walked up, toweling herself off from a fresh and cooling swim. After listening to their discussion for a few minutes and hearing things like “coconut grenades” and “I’ll kneel behind one and you push him over” she finally shook her head, dropped her towel and walked right down into the midst of the surly pirates, with Skip and Herk watching in shocked disbelief. “Hi fellas” she said and kept walking right through the camp and to the stream to the west (which was only a foot deep), and on toward the lava fields. The pirates followed, stopping at the stream for a few seconds to discuss whether they should build the bridge again before plunging through to the other side. Skip and Herk followed behind at a safe distance, not wanting to foil Chastity’s plan.
Chastity led the pirates west to the lava fields, home of Thing 1 and Thing 2… so named by Skip because they reminded him of two characters in the only book he ever finished reading. If you ask him, he can’t remember the title of the book but he does remember it’s about a cat with a really big hat. Thing 1 and Thing 2 are usually very gentle creatures, but they get very aggressive when near vikings because the vikings used to tie them to the prow of their ships and make them pull their ships around. Unfortunately for the pirates, the very ship that they commandeered was the ship to which these particular Things were enslaved. So when the hapless pirates followed Chastity into the fields, the Things ate them. So ended the Great Pirate Invasion. Herk was happy because he got a really cool sword.

It was while they were in the lava fields that they discovered the really big monkey head on the peninsula to the northwest. Skip, having failed geography in school, didn’t know what a peninsula was and so named it Really Big Monkey Head Island. They thought the monkey head was not to be taken lightly, but mostly just really cool. So they set up an altar (a spare bathtub they had in their van) and filled it with beer to drink – no, sacrifice to the Really Big Monkey Head.
One day while sacrificing to the Really Big Monkey Head, Skip noticed that the plants on the slopes across the water were not the same as on the rest of the island. So the three of them ventured over to take a closer look. Chastity, being an expert in all things botanical, realized that they were coffee bean trees and immediately devised a clever business venture. Skip would take care of the cultivating, roasting, and packaging. She would come up with a design for the bags. Herk would carry the full bags to the various coffee shops around the world.. because that’s what he does. Skip discovered another plant growing among the coffee trees and came up with his own special blend, “Skip’s Evening Buzz.”

So, after turning their tiny roasting business into a multi-million Linden franchise, Chastity got bored and decided to return to the mainland and open her own hair-styling business and leave the coffee businesss to the boys. And thus “The Perfect Wave” was born, featuring Chastity’s signature hair style, as seen here.

And that is how it all began…


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